Black People Are Following Me Everywhere

I HATE BLACK PEOPLE.

FUCKING HATE THEM.

They’re everywhere! Creeping around, ducking behind things, acting generally SNEAKY and EVIL. Always! Everywhere! BLACK PEOPLE.

I don’t understand where they came from. They seemed to have been assigned to people, like we all own one. But I don’t want a black person! Mine is ENTIRELY UNNERVING.

And they are certainly connected to black magic! I do not see how they COULD NOT. Perhaps you could, dear reader, but that’s because you’re a FUCKING IMBECILE.

IDIOT.

I doubt there is much of a chance even you, in your moronic stupor, have not seen these black people. For while I do not know you personally (and thank the Dead God for that!), I know that EVERYONE I SEE has a black person sneaking around behind them.

Except, of course, at night. At least as far as I can tell. It could very well be that the black people are camouflaged at night. After all – they’re black!

And the way they sneak on the floor! As if they’re made of it! It is ALWAYS disconcerting when beings from ANOTHER DIMMENSION invade your own. I AM TELLING YOU THIS. AGREE WITH IT.

NOD YOUR FUCKING HEAD.

And they’re shapeshifters! As I bring light to investigate the matter, the black person can SHRINK, or DANCE AROUND BEHIND YOU AGAIN. Or grow to insane lengths!

And they always MIMIC YOUR SHAPE. They are surely plotting to over throw everything in this world! Which, on its face, is not a foreboding prospect, as everything in this world is HORRIBLE. But I fear the black people may bring something worse!

It is difficult to fathom whether or not two dimensions would be a terrible constraint, or simply one less dimension of SUCK.

Worst of all – ABSOLUTE WORST – is how benign you believe black people to be! No one seems to care about them! NO ONE. NOT A SINGLE ONE OF YOU UNINFORMED, JELLY-BRAINED LUNATICS. And that is my service to you, oh undeserving ones! TO WARN YOU ABOUT THE BLACK PEOPLE.

In fact, the only time I’ve seen humans acknowledge black people are when children wave their fingers and see black people SHAPESHIFT into beasts! And the overgrown fetuses LAUGH at this trick! They even seem to attempt to play along, waggling their deficient digits in sync with the EVER SO ALARMING CHOMPING OF BEASTS ON THE ADJACENT WALL. Beasts made of black people!

I can think of no way to defeat these invaders, shadowing our every move, for I have tried to capture one! My own, in fact! For, as I have stated (And don’t you EVER, fucking EVER FORGET ANYTHING I TELL YOU FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE), everything in this world has a black person assigned to it! Even the trees and boxes and single mothers!

But victory was not mine, as it never is, for capturing my black person was impossible! He was not on my floor – HE WAS IN IT. Inhabiting the cold granite itself! Such a feat escapes my working knowledge of the laws of physics, and I assure you, filthy idiot, that my even tenuous grasp on the subject far exceeds your capacity for understanding!

I can offer no solace, nor comfort, nor aid in these matters. THE BLACK PEOPLE ARE COMING TO KILL YOU. THEY’RE HIDING INSIDE EVERYTHING AND THEY’RE FOLLOWING YOU. They’re going to tear this world asunder, and I firmly believe that it deserves it! Regardless, I still do not look forward to screaming my distaste at the world of black people to come. Perhaps, only then, will you foul cockstains realize how badly you FUCKED UP YOUR OWN WORLD.

By letting the BLACK PEOPLE RUN RAMPANT ALL OVER IT. TAKING IT. STEALING IT. COVERING IT IN SHADOWY SHADOWS MADE OF BLACK PEOPLE.